I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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