But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
