There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize