I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
