i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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