my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
