so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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