Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I just had sex on a roof
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
