i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
You need a sexual gate keeper
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
