Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
