hotel room ftw
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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