Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
