Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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