just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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