I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
You ate ashes out of my bong
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize