Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
What a dumb baby whore.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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