I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
