Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
