Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize