So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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