just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize