If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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