My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
