The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
You've changed since you got that strap on
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
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