i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
