gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
