Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
