i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
