Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
