i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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