I feel great
I just peed on a car
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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