Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
