we're blogging at a bar
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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