Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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