Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
