yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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