So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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