he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
