i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
