flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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