Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
