One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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