The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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