It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
