I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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