lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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