Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize