He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize