In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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