Texts From Last Night

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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..

  (1-605): View more from South Dakota

  Both

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  (605): white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup.. (1-605): Both http://tfl.nu/cq4l
  Replies (18) Good night (2003) Bad night (625)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.

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  (617): I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian. http://tfl.nu/jfuh
  Replies (30) Good night (3192) Bad night (511)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"

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  (703): Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises" http://tfl.nu/h5gc
  Replies (3) Good night (1610) Bad night (469)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?

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  (517): I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore? http://tfl.nu/tjz8
  Replies (18) Good night (1028) Bad night (3945)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over

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  (608): I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over http://tfl.nu/rs0c
  Replies (32) Good night (1467) Bad night (5473)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.

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  (501): i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever. http://tfl.nu/sfg3
  Replies (31) Good night (1348) Bad night (4170)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  It's shedding

  (1-912): View more from Georgia

  I told you penises don't tan

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  (912): It's shedding (1-912): I told you penises don't tan http://tfl.nu/7fx9
  Replies (43) Good night (1401) Bad night (10179)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.

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  (267): So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from. http://tfl.nu/6xgn
  Replies (14) Good night (3696) Bad night (1147)
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  (+43): View more from

  She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.

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  (+43): She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in. http://tfl.nu/w2z8
  Replies (3) Good night (793) Bad night (2332)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?

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  (717): What time do you think you'll be heterosexual? http://tfl.nu/40xd
  Replies (6) Good night (1183) Bad night (653)
• Favorite

  (660): View more from Missouri

  On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.

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  (660): On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics. http://tfl.nu/mn1y
  Replies (24) Good night (2753) Bad night (485)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex

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  (817): Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex http://tfl.nu/6b6a
  Replies (3) Good night (973) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.

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  (240): The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off. (301): Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes. http://tfl.nu/qb2k
  Replies (3) Good night (1057) Bad night (280)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?

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  (770): So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night? http://tfl.nu/hytr
  Replies (3) Good night (467) Bad night (258)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo

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  (203): Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo http://tfl.nu/o8no
  Replies (0) Good night (550) Bad night (255)

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