Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk

  (678): View more from Georgia

  discrete masterbation is a lost art

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk (678): discrete masterbation is a lost art http://tfl.nu/z067
  Replies (32) Good night (627) Bad night (2693)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Its about making memories worth repressing

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): Its about making memories worth repressing http://tfl.nu/5fiw
  Replies (1) Good night (2693) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game. http://tfl.nu/c0fd
  Replies (11) Good night (4579) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control? http://tfl.nu/y9i1
  Replies (27) Good night (1553) Bad night (3626)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker http://tfl.nu/o91j
  Replies (14) Good night (9337) Bad night (1378)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit. http://tfl.nu/ykdx
  Replies (45) Good night (5365) Bad night (1501)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea. http://tfl.nu/cv1y
  Replies (13) Good night (2043) Bad night (940)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck http://tfl.nu/cg9j
  Replies (12) Good night (3372) Bad night (837)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen? http://tfl.nu/tjza
  Replies (20) Good night (6117) Bad night (936)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck? http://tfl.nu/k3jz
  Replies (6) Good night (2359) Bad night (630)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  .....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar..... (507): .....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls.... http://tfl.nu/yj71
  Replies (5) Good night (809) Bad night (508)
• Favorite

  (524): View more from

  I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (524): I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex. http://tfl.nu/y2h0
  Replies (6) Good night (308) Bad night (1562)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me. http://tfl.nu/3nzi
  Replies (9) Good night (851) Bad night (270)
• Favorite

  (289): View more from Ontario

  God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (289): God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore. (519): Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor. http://tfl.nu/xdad
  Replies (8) Good night (1193) Bad night (344)
• Favorite

  (235): View more from

  Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (235): Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants. http://tfl.nu/kei7
  Replies (2) Good night (628) Bad night (219)

Randomize