I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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