i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
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